INCOMING! KILLER SPAM SCAM PORN FLOOD APPROACHING!

Hold on tight, folks, because a massive tidal wave of spam is about to slam down on your email. We're talking disgusting amounts of scammy emails packed with vile porn. These scumbags are trying to scam you out of your hard-earned money, so be super cautious. Don't click on any images in these emails, and report them immediately. Be smart!